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| My youngest, Miss Sicky Sickerson |
Our household is currently battling the stomach bug. It's been hanging out since Friday, passing through a few of us at a time. The littler ones are continuing to exhibit some symptoms, though the majority of their suffering seems to have passed. The hubs and I are feeling mostly better, with still-queasy stomachs and slight weakness from not eating.
In any case, my dear friend posted on Facebook a couple notes she took from one of the talks from the mission, and I was so blessed to be able to receive the message through her, but also felt frustrated and disappointed that I could not be there in person for the entire experience: Confession, Mass, then the talks given by Fr. Tuscan. I had been looking forward to it, and am still feeling the sting of not being able to go because of the sickness in my household. I feel cheated out of this extra time with the Lord, a special Lenten gift so generously offered by our priests.
It's always so difficult to really take advantage of all that Lent has to offer in the ever-growing desire to empty out oneself and draw closer to the Lord. Lent is traditionally the liturgical season to put specific focus on this, although it's a crucial practice in your every-day, but especially within a large, busy family, sometimes Lent sneaks up on you. And sometimes your best-laid plans to really make Lent meaningful and fruitful in your spiritual journey actually end up by the wayside, or, in our current case, down the drain. This can happen for so many reasons, including laziness, or a lack of self-discipline and/or diligence. It's one thing to be in control of it, and to then be disappointed in yourself for not following through, but it's a whole other issue to have those plans be destroyed by something you can't control, like sickness running through your household.
It's frustrating, to say the least. But it's also humbling.
I recently came across this really insightful quote from St. Francis of Rome, and then came across it again just this morning, and since then it has been a source of great comfort (and humility) to assuage the despair in missing out on the mission, as well as a few other practices within our home we had incorporated for Lent but have been too sick to execute these past few days. Read:
"A married woman must often leave God at the altar to find Him in her household care."
This speaks volumes to me as I navigate the remnants of the virus and its aftermath, as well as the disappointment of missing out on my * planned * means of Lenten devotions. This week of Lent, God has called me away from the altar, away from the "easy" means to love, worship, and draw closer to Him. He has called me not to a beautiful church with its peace and quiet, not to an organized retreat with Mass and words of wisdom from a beloved priest, not to a respite with my husband from the nitty-gritty of daily life with many children, but to ground zero of a horrible sickness in all of its gory detail, to sleepless nights, to a clingy, fussy baby who wants to constantly nurse. He has called me to find Him amidst the chaos of a household in distress.
In this Lenten season, we are called to choose special devotions, sacrifices and offerings in order to empty ourselves out so to be filled with the Holy Spirit, to unite ourselves to Christ on His cross, His passion and death, to truly realize our humble humanity, as well as the magnanimity of Christ's love: His life offered up for us. Having a particular suffering chosen for us doesn't negate the other, but it can, in its own right, provide a means of grace, as well as a kind of devotion and love to offer up to our King. I may not have chosen this particular mode of suffering and sacrifice, but I can choose how to utilize it: as either a humble offering, uniting myself to His passion, or as a source of complaint and despair.
I choose the former.
PS. A few quick notes, practical and spiritual 😇 :
Practical: In my desperate search for how to best attack the Noro virus (the most common culprit for the stomach bug), I found that you MUST get a cleaner that specifically says that it will kill Noro. It would be good to maybe keep this stuff on hand from Nov-April when this type of virus is in its prime. Lesson learned for me. Fortunately, we've NEVER in our 15 years of parenthood had to deal with this relentless illness, at least not to the extreme we have been, but there's always a first time for everything, right? Incidentally, I am normally a pretty crunchy/naturally-minded person for our household but I felt like this called for the big guns.
We bought several things:
(NOTE: these are NOT affiliate links and I didn't necessarily order these products all from Amazon)
*Purell Multi-Surface
*Lysol Max cover; hubs chose garden after the rain scent which is not too offensive
*Clorox Healthcare w/Hydrogen Peroxide, cleaner and also wipes
*Germstar Noro hand sanitizer
I read that you can also use hydrogen peroxide 3% on its own. To appease my psychological despair over all.the.germs, these killer cleaners seemed like a better suit for us.
Spiritual: (And shameless plug). Inspired by the notes from Tuesday's talk which my friend had posted, coupled with our sickness experience, I wrote a blog post on The Final Battle blog. If you need some inspiration about forgiveness in your marriage, I hope you will find it here.
